All Hail the Conquering Cleaner!

Upon returning from the far away land of Missouri, I was determined to start a week-long creative frenzy.

You see, my last show of the season is this coming Saturday, and I want to introduce new robots and have lots of jewelry on hand, taking full advantage of the holiday buying madness. Hopefully. (Anything you can personally do to further inflame the madness would be much appreciated.)

So yesterday, I went downstairs, brimming with the loftiest of dreams, only to be shot down by the reality of my neglected workshop.













Armed with spider spray and a Route 44 Coke, I came, I saw, I found table tops.












(Notice the practical use of the air hockey table for robot assembly stations. Nice, huh?)

Quote of the Day

"No, you can not sleep in the cabinet tonight."

"Vacation"

Almost every year since we moved back to Kansas, we've gone on "vacation" with my mom and dad to one of their timeshares at the Lake of the Ozarks.

This year is no different. Currently, I'm sitting in an outdated, yet surprisingly spacious condo. Because I only have the use of a three-foot ethernet cord to gain internet access, my computer is precariously balanced on the couch's faux suede armrest while I awkwardly type away.

[Sidenote: No matter which condo we get, it always seems to have the same builder's grade teal carpet with flecks of pink, aqua, and tan zigzagging through it. Why is that?]

Every three minutes, I find myself saying, "Step over the cord!" (with an occasional "Go under the cord!" thrown in for variation's sake). My three rambunctious boys seem to have gone deaf--or just can't hear me over the reverberating echo of their own shouts--but I stubbornly adhere to my mantra as any other distracted mother would.

I knew my uncharacteristically optimistic hope for this trip was far-fetched to begin with: This would be a week to relax, to regenerate, to reawaken my creativity so that, at the end of the week, I could go back home and produce works of utter genius.

However, after three days, a little bit of reality has set in--under the guise of a three-foot ethernet cable and a rainy afternoon.

I suppose, at this point in my life, these vacations are really for the kids, and though that might mean letting go of my hopes for personal rest and relaxation, I'm certainly going to take full advantage of vacation mentality and eat chocolate chip cookies with a little less guilt . . . and maybe even chase them down with a 12-pack of Coke.

Errgh.

Computer tower. Allegedly fixed. "Should turn on."

Completely unhooked. Thousands of unplugged cords lying in a dust puddle.

Skinny rectangular mdf compartment. Slide tower in.

Heavy, immoveable desk approximately two and a half inches from the wall.

Fingers do not have eyes.

[Insert clip from Office Space. Smashing the computer with background of loud rap music.]

A Rare Look into the Phenomenon of Productivity

I've been quite productive today. I mailed two Etsy orders (in an appropriate amount of time, I might add!), contacted some stores about my steampunk jewelry (okay, so it was just an email feeler, but at least it's something), took pictures of several new items, contacted a couple of people about special orders, and even loaded some of those new items on Etsy.

I could conclude the day by conquering the world and turning everyone into recycled robots . . . or, at least, lovers of recycled robot . . . but, I think I will simply bask in my accomplishments and look for something innane to watch on TLC.

The Plague of Flies

Our house is being overtaken by flies.

They're everywhere. Everywhere, I tell you.

Is it the colder weather? Is it the unswept kitchen floors? I know not the answer. My response has been to repeatedly remonstrate the boys about keeping the door shut (they have been instructed to dash in and dash out), but to no avail. Those tricky flies have to be coming in another way.

Although I have not yet identified that stealthy means of entry, I can certainly attest to the fact that they just keep coming. Our wood floors have become unmarked graveyards for hoards of flies. (One night, my oldest and I counted 22 dead flies in the living room alone.)

Why is this happening?

On another note, I took my whole family to the antique mall and found an incredible, orange enamel teapot for only $7! One of my best finds ever!

It's Been a Long Week

The short synopsis of this endlessly long week:

- Monday, my main computer refused to turn on. (Think no access to files, photos, emails, etc.)
- I am now "sharing" my laptop with my eight-year-old son who thinks it's his computer because he's making an 8-point-font, extensive spreadsheet of all his baseball cards (numbering well over 500).
- My house feels as though it has entered the deepest, darkest level of disarray there can be. I'm scared to go in the bathrooms--scared enough to consider implementing a blindfold policy for all who dare enter.
- I've come to the realization I am not an organized artist, no matter how hard I try. (See above reference to deep, dark disarray.)
- My boys are pretending they hate each other and, subsequently, fighting about everything. However, I'm going to cling to the belief that they do love each other and this is somehow all just a misguided masquerade for my benefit.
- I inadvertantly keep "volunteering" to do things at the boys' school . . . enough said.
- My oldest has come home sick today. Tomorrow is Grandparent's Day at school, and he is very concerned about who will be the cochlia in the 3rd grade Parts of the Ear presentation if he can't make it.

Sigh.

Long week. Not enough robot making or watch disassembling.

BUT . . . Good hasn't completely gone into hiding:
- I love my art.
- I love my kids.
- And, maybe, just maybe I can make a robot that will take care of all my worldly needs!

Wheeeel of Fortune!

"Look at these luxurious prizes...fabulous merchandise just waiting to be won today on Wheeeeeeeeeeel of Fortune! A 14 Karat gold money clip and lighter! A pair of motorcycles! Total retail value: over $38,000!"

"You've got about $129 left.

Would you like to use that to buy the metallic fish sculpture? Now, you've got $23 left. We can put that on account or on a Tiffany gift certificate."

Does anyone else miss the good ole days? I've been playing Wheel of Fortune on Facebook, and it's made me nostalgic.

I just want the his and her matching jogging suits for $300, Pat!

Now, I promise I'm going to go list items on Etsy. Hold me accountable, and check it out later today. If I haven't, I'll sacrifice a Bitty Bot on the altar of the craft gods to atone for my sins.

The Pitfalls of Children and Cameras

Despite the need to fulfill my currently empty promise of listing more jewelry on Etsy, I instead tried to take pictures of Bella in her new ROBOT collar (made by my friend and craft-booth-mate Sarah).





After this experience, I fear my success rate, at least pertaining to getting jewelry listed, may be quite limited today. Children should not be allowed on the premises.



But don't you love the robots?